PFC Richard A. Dewater, 21, of Topeka, Kan., died April 15, of wounds sustained from an improvised explosive device, while on a dismounted patrol near Korengal Valley, Afghanistan. He was assigned to the 1st Battalion, 26th Infantry Regiment, 3rd Brigade Combat Team, 1st Infantry Division, Fort Hood, Texas.
Bob DeWater didn't want his son to join the military. Ultimately, he gave his blessing.
"I wanted to say no in hopes it would stop him," DeWater said. "But he asked me like a man. I couldn't say no."
Department of Defense officials said Pfc. Richard A. DeWater, 21, of Topeka, was on a dismounted U.S. Army patrol as a part of Operation Enduring Freedom near Korengal Valley, Afghanistan, when he was fatally wounded by an improvised explosive device on April 15.
DeWater, who doesn't support the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq, takes consolation knowing his son died doing what he loved — serving his country.
DeWater spoke with The Topeka Capital-Journal on Tuesday about his son, who was slated to return home in June.
"When he was 4, he said he wanted to be (in the military)," he said. "It lit a spark in him. It was a dream of his."
Richard "Rick" DeWater moved to Topeka with his father in May 2007. He was born in San Diego. He and his wife, Valerie, were married in Topeka in June 2008.
His son was deployed in July. Bob couldn't bear the thought of losing his son, but he tried to support him in every way possible.
"What do you think when you learn your firstborn is going to the most deadliest place in the Middle East?" he asked. "We talked on the phone or online as much as possible. Missions were really tough on me. I kept thinking, 'Something is happening.' But Rick said no news is good news. I just kept that in mind."
A FATHER'S LOVE
My son, Rick, he is a hero as well!! I have 2 sons, Nicholas, my youngest. They both probably dunno it, but they are the apples of my eye, I love them both more then life itself !! This sux (expletive), i know what im thinking / feeling, i just cant seem to get it out. — Bob DeWater, written on his
myspace.com page
A day or so before his son was killed, DeWater was online at Yahoo chatting with some friends. He noticed his son's name flash up on his computer, indicating Rick was online, too.
"I missed him," DeWater said he realized. "I thought, 'I'll just catch him next time.' I didn't know there wasn't going to be a next time."
The last time the two spoke on the phone was right after April 10. Rick seemed "jazzed" about something, his father said.
"He said he couldn't talk about it," DeWater said. "But he also said he was looking forward to coming home. Too many of them look forward to coming home, and they don't."
That would be the last time he would hear his son's voice.
'DIED FOR A REASON'
DeWater said he believes his son was engaged in battle on or about April 10 when his platoon ambushed a Taliban unit.
An article written by C.J. Chivers with the New York Times confirmed Rick's platoon had indeed ambushed a Taliban unit a few days before his death, killing at least 13 insurgents.
"That was his platoon," DeWater said. "I know he was there. They wanted revenge on my son's platoon. My son died for a reason. He saved all of their lives. People have to know my son. They can't know him now, but they can know who he was."
That is the reason DeWater hasn't been reluctant to talk to the media. In fact, photographs accompanying Chivers' article show the last few minutes of his son's life. The photos don't bother DeWater, he said, because it gives him a chance to see his son in action.
THE PHONE CALL
"As I sit here on this Easter sunday, i find myself thinking yet again. I really dont know much, but I do know i feel very empty. Every since my two sons left i have been feeling this way, first my youngest, now 18, went to georga to live with his mom and step dad, then my oldest last year left for the army at 21. now, proud as i am, i still cant help but feel empty inside." — Bob DeWater, written on his
myspace.com page
DeWater, who works at the Goodyear Tire & Rubber Co. plant, received a phone call at 8 p.m. April 15 that shook him to the core. He was fixing himself some food in his kitchen in North Topeka when it came.
"My ex-wife told me to sit down," DeWater said. "It dawned on me, and I said, 'Oh God, please tell me it's not Rick.' I don't remember much after that. Now, I'm wondering. There's anger. Hate. Everything recycles. The what ifs. The how comes. It sucks for it to happen to anyone. It sucks even more it was my son. But I can't wish this on anyone. I can't have someone else go through this."
PUTTING A HERO TO REST
DeWater received word Tuesday that his son's body was being released. It will be flown to Oregon, where a military ceremony will be conducted at Roseburg National Cemetery. Rick considered Grants Pass, Ore., his home. Final funeral arrangements are still in the works but Dewater says it will be Thursday or Friday in Oregon, one of Rick's favorite places.
"He has earned everything I can do for him and then some," DeWater said. "Today has been a hellish day of waiting. I don't know when anything will happen."
His son will be cremated after the military ceremony.
"I have sacrificed a son, but what have I gained?" DeWater asked with tears in his eyes. "But there has to be a plan. I don't understand it now, but hopefully, one day, I can. He was amazing. He had a personality that would draw you in. He loved fishing. He loved guns. He loved what he was doing. He dedicated himself to it. He believed in what he was doing. It (the war in Afghanistan) has been drug out too long, and we're losing money. But I support all of our troops."
Friends will miss the fallen soldier, too.
Ryan Burge, 23, of Topeka, said he and several of Rick's friends met Sunday at Echo Cliff near Dover to remember their friend.
"He was a great guy," Burge said. "He was always set on going into the military. It is a shock that he is gone."
Bob said his son's wife is struggling with the death but is dealing with it day by day. She remains in Fort Hood, Texas, where the couple lived.
DeWater also is taking his life day by day and has undertaken the burden of planning his son's funeral.
"Rick was my world," he said. "How am I getting through? I don't know that I am getting through this. I guess I'm just getting."
PFC Dewater is survived by his wife Valerie, his dad Bob, his brother Nicholas, and his mom and stepdad.
